League of Legends: The 10 Commandments of URF

League of Legends. Photo courtesy of Riot Games.
League of Legends. Photo courtesy of Riot Games. /
URF. League of Legends.
League of Legends. Photo courtesy of Riot Games. /

If thou wishes to play URF mode in League of Legends, here are the 10 Commandments thou must follow.

Greetings Summoner. Thou wishes to join thy friends on the battlefield to participate in the ultimate test of League of Legends ability. To play the Game of Games, Ultra Rapid Fire mode or URF as it may be known to the common man.

Well, if thou does desire such spirited competition among enlightened competitors such as yourself, there are unspoken codes of conduct that thou must obey. What follows are the 10 Commandments of URF, which thou must heed if thou wishes to emerge victorious from the battle.

1. Thou shalt not flame thy teammates

URF is a game of merriment, spirited and good-natured revelry. There is no rank, spoils, or glory to be had by victory, only the enjoyment one can feel in their soul.

Thou shalt, therefore, refrain from flame and toxicity towards thy teammates who may be enjoying themselves by playing a brand new champion, trying out a new build, or just generally feeding. Let thy newbies play and frolic however they see fit.

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2. Thou shalt not become salty

While thou and thy teammates may play for fun, picking random champions, thy enemy may not be in such a merry mood. If thy enemy is in such a foul mood, thou shalt not become a salty little baby. Do not accuseth thy enemy of “try-harding” and “playing broken champions” for all champions are broken in URF and winning, even in the mode of merriment, always tastes sweet.

3. Thou shalt not gloat

In those cases where thou art on the winning team, thou shalt remember that winning and losing on the battlefield are secondary to enjoyment. Good-natured ribbing is, of course, always fun. But beware that one does not become a sore winner with gloats of “gg ez” in a mode that is meant to be easy.

4. Thou shalt always engage in a 5v5 in the top lane

At the start of combat, the Game of Games demands blood sacrifice in order to begin the proceedings. Thus, thou must commit to going with thy teammates to the top lane via the catapult and engaging in fisticuffs with thy opponents. If thou goest to thy desired lane instead, thou shalt be called a “scaredy-cat” for the rest of the game.

5. Thou shalt not enter thy jungle whilst outer towers stand

URF is a game where the normal rules of League of Legends are forgotten, replaced by the rules of the Game of Games. In this meta, there is no need for junglers, ganking, or macro play when thoust pockets burst with gold and map traversal is accomplished in an instant.

Therefore, there is no need for thou to venture into the jungle to “farm” for “items.” To do this is to allow thy teammate to face a 2v1, thus leading to them being smote by vengeful enemies repeatedly.

6. Thou shalt always build full damage

Whether thou desires to play an enchanter like Soraka, a vanguard like Nautilus, or a useless champion like Ivern, thou shalt always build as if thy name is Chad. Triple Infinity Edge on Braum may be mocked by thy teammates, but thou is not afraid to back down from a fight.

7. Thou shalt not take exhaust

With a cornucopia of summoners that thou may take on a greatly discounted cooldown, I caution that, though it may be tempting, taking exhaust is for cowards. Our father, whose name is Chad, will smite thee if thoust takes exhaust instead of ignite.

8. Thy solo laner shalt have waveclear

In the meta of the Game of Games, thoust team shalt run a 2-1-2 set-up during the laning phase, with two lanes of duo and one lane left in isolation. If thou have ample waveclear to defend thy turret alone, thoust shalt volunteer for this honor of playing alone.

9. Thou shalt try to end the game quickly

URF shalt not be a mode wherein players are trapped for extended periods of time, unlike normal League of Legends. If thy game is not a closely-contested affair, any amount of time spent playing after 15-minutes is too long.

Thou shalt resolve to take Dragons and Barons, to push down towers, as one wouldst do in a normal League of Legends game. Even though thou art playing URF, thou should not tempt the Gods of Throwing.

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10. Thou shalt ban Shaco

Because, although thou art the Son of Chad and may very well be able to wallop any enemy the gods may bring, thou art not a fool.