LCS: A Roast of All the Teams of the 2020 LCS Season

Los Angeles, California - February 8: --- during 2020 LCS Spring Split at the LCS Arena on February 8, 2020 in Los Angeles, California, USA.. (Photo by Colin Young-Wolff/Riot Games)
Los Angeles, California - February 8: --- during 2020 LCS Spring Split at the LCS Arena on February 8, 2020 in Los Angeles, California, USA.. (Photo by Colin Young-Wolff/Riot Games) /
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LCS Studios. (Photo by Colin Young-Wolff/Riot Games)
LCS Studios. (Photo by Colin Young-Wolff/Riot Games) /

With the LCS Season over for the year, it’s time to look back on all the good and (mostly) bad times with our end of the year roast of all the LCS teams!

Welcome, welcome friends, players, casters, management, and the grubby LCS fans who broke quarantine to be here. I apologize that we are so delayed in kicking this off, NA production, and all, it seems that a bird landed on a telephone wire two miles from here so we might have to chronobreak this whole roast but we’re going to power along. Let’s get started with the first-ever Roast of the 2020 LCS Season!

Now that the LCS Season is done for the year and Worlds are approaching, it’s appropriate that we take some time to honor everyone who participated by mercilessly flaming them for all their failings before our three representatives go to China and get smacked by some low-level Korean and Turkish teams, adding another chapter to the book of NA embarrassment. All of this is in good fun, I assure you, and if you think I’m crossing a line remember IWillDominate had LEC players and coaches spectating the LCS all year with him so anything I say they have undoubtedly said something similar but 1000 times worse.

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Let’s kick things off by addressing the real heroes of LCS, the production crew. Yeah, we might have had more pauses during games than William Shatner at the top of a mountain but you all managed to do one heck of a job in less-than-ideal situations. And don’t worry about that whole “hour-long pause during the championship series” decision, I’m sure FlyQuest and their fans won’t hold that against you forever.

The casters and analysts also deserve props for their ability to roll with the punches. Dash and LeTigress both did exceptionally well at not rolling their eyes every time they were asked to say the words “LCS Dome.”

On the desk, MarkZ, Crumbz, and Prolly all tried their very hardest to look just impressive enough for some desperate LCS team like Dignitas to ask them to be their head coach next year. Man, it’s gonna be really rough for them having to analyze the drafts of coach Ovilee next year but oh so entertaining for us.

CaptainFlowers is here too. I feel bad for his significant other because I don’t think this man could ever love anyone or anything as much as he loves seeing Skarner get locked in during an LCS game. Keep doing you boo.

We also have a literal world champion at this roast with Azael! Sure it’s a World of Warcraft championship from 2007, which means about as much as being the Fall Guys Champion of the Upper Northeast Regional Finals, but hey it sure looks good on the resume!

Rivington and Pastrytime are here, just doing this and that in the background. Sorry I don’t have anything more because you were mostly on the Academy broadcasts this year and I typically had some paint to watch dry when those games were on.

It even looks like Kobe left his non-existent cat at home to be at the roast! Man, I didn’t think there could be anything sadder than a grown man who only has a cat to comfort him, but somehow not having the cat is even sadder.

Last but not least it’s Phreak himself. Now I know this is difficult because with his deep chest of puns any joke I make he’s just going to pun me right back, so I’m just going to say that he looks like a middle school math teacher and move. Okay, actually that’s not fair, middle school math teachers have better puns! Alright, then let’s get to the stars of tonight’s roast: the teams.